Imaginative Bridges: Nature or Nuture?

"One thing I love about stories--in both movies and literature--is the
ability to align yourselves with the characters and identify with their
emotions. Some people (like my husband) can't/don't (I haven't figured
out which is correct) do this, and this makes me sad. They can't FEEL
the story."

Okay, I am quoting myself, but please, don't think I take myself too seriously. I'd just like to continue the conversation. And here's why:

I finally got my husband to take me to see Avatar, a world-renowned phenomenon that I wanted to experience. I could tell after the first 10 minutes, my husband HATED it. The following argument ensued:

Why! How could you hate this movie that was 1) a marvelous work of art and 2) a brilliant metaphor for a thousand lessons about love, survival, racism/oppression, greed, preserving natural resources, etc.

He HATES science fiction. Ok..I can understand, It's not for everyone. But can that really stop you from seeing beyond? from empathy? from aligning your emotions to the story and identifying with it?

In my case, no. Nothing stops me from identifying with a story in either film, literature, or a guy on the street--maybe this is a trait of an English teacher? I abstain from watching "heavy" films that I know will cause me to hurt for several hours or even days after watching them. For example, I refused to watch P.S. I Love You for 2 years after it's release. I know I would cry, and when I did watch it, I was heartbroken for about 2 days. When I watched that film, I could FEEL the pain. I missed MY husband, who was just at work. I cried more than any character in the movie. Yes, I am deeply affected by stories. Not just love stories. War Stories--I cried in the theater and felt a mixtures of sadness and terror in my heart for days after watching We Were Soldiers. Amistad--the injustice weighed down my heart for weeks.

I carry the emotion of whatever I watch (or read) much longer than just the duration of the movie (or book). My husband, however, cannot comprehend this attachment. He is the one who leans over as I'm crying during any movie or and says "It's just a movie." He looks at me like I'm crazy (not that it's ruled out) and rolls his eyes. I question this lack of connection often, more for an understanding of WHY he doesn't put himself in the shoes of the characters. I know that some of my students must feel this way. If only I could understand WHY he isn't affected like I am, maybe I could unlock the key to understanding why kids --and my husband--don't read anything for entertainment. If there is no connection, what investment would anyone put towards something?

My biggest question is if he DOESN'T feel empathy (or sympathy) or if he CAN'T. Are some of us just born more "sappy" than others? Why can I understand how the characters feel and find some symbolism that applies to my life in every movie I watch and book I read? And why can't he? Is he physically incapable? Or is there some magic switch deep down that can be flipped?

And how deep does this go? If this same trend follows the imaginative bridge into other areas, what else isn't my husband interested in that he should/could/would be if it wasn't for this disconnect?

I wonder, for the sake of my husband and all of my students, what CAN'T you feel? If I could anser this and find the key to unlocking that ability to identify with information, imagine the improvements I could make in education.